Meri Pehli Kavita

To dosto baat us waqt ki hai jab mein tha in pehli kaksha,
And both of us used to go to school in the same rikshaa.

Rikshe mein dekh ke usko pehli baar
Mere haath se fisal gayee woh kissme toffee bar

Usne mujhe uthaa kar jab woh chocolate di
I told her, "You look as sweet as a laddu of desi ghee."

Jab muskaa ke she told me, "Thank you".
I swear my friends it was a pleasurable view..

Aakhe matkaa ke usne puchha mujhse mera naam,
dekh k uski adaaye to ho gayaa meraa kaam tamaam.

"Pushkar" maine bhi bade nautankiya andaaz mein farmaaya
maa kasam us beauty ke saamne tha saara universe sharmaaya

"Isse pehle ki chhut jaaye apna riksha,
batlaati hoon tumhe ki mera naam hai diksha.."

Phir nazre bachaa huyi ke baaki sabse,
woh qayaamat dhaati hui boli bhakse

"Badaa pyaara naam hai tumhaara Pukshaa"
Wah dear! Ek hi jhatke mein badal diya tumne mere naam ka nakshaa.

Sharing ke khaatir phir aage ki maine meri pighli huyi toffee,
lekin us zaalim ne to saari ki saari hi le li.

To apni pyaari si bag, kissme aur kismat saath liye,
Riksha, Diksha aur Puksha ek saath chal diye.

As I thought about paaring my pyaar ki naiyaa,
I khusar fusarred in the ear of rikshewaale bhaiyaa.

"I know bhaiya you are quite cool,
Won't you take us to the park after the school?"

Such a superb fellow that before the fall of dark,
He made sure we were playing in the park.

Such a calm driver he never did any ghaai,
Later I came to know he too had a setting with a sexy shaantibaai..

Careful hokar main agle din 2 kissme toffee laaya tha
aur dono lete huye diksha ne mujhe bataaya tha

"Building ki ladkiyo pe tum hi tum chaaye ho,
aaj akalmandi se mere liye 2 toffee laaye ho.

I know ek din purey duniya pe tum chaaoge..
kya kal se mere liye 2 aur toffee laaoge?"

Tab se main samajh gaya, pyaar mein padna gandaa hai
kya toffiya banana mera gharwaalo ka dhandha hai?

Khair us din Diksha kuch aur hi soch ke aayi thi..
Mere liye, 10 din puraani puri bhaaji laayi thi

Socha maine: "Yeh khaake jaroor tere pyaar mein ban jaauga Jogi"
Tabhi usne kahaa: "pyaar se khaana, it is a leftover of my doggy"

In the mean time our riksha was running at full throttle
Tabhi dhyaan mein aaya, "haai, fir bhul gaya water bottle"

Maine kahaa "Jaanu, tere pyaar mein my galaa is completely sukha"
She said, "Tumhaare liye Ramu ne Tommy ka susu preserve kar ke hai rakha"

Mann hi mann maine a la Gabbar socha, "Na jaane Yeh aur kya kya khilaayegi,
Is gustaakhhi ki sajaa ise baraabar milegi."

In the meantime, I was missing my bottle jispe likha 'Made in China' hai
Yeh rikshewaala bhi saala kuch jyaada hi shaayna hai

"Jaldi chalo bhaiyaa kal se ek maal teacher hai aayi,
in return,I'll give u this tasty dish to have with shantibaai"

Rikshewaale kadak aawaj mein bola, "Tumko to main time pe hi pahochaaunga
yeh gandagi to mein bilkul bhi nahi khaaunga..

chaahe tu mujhe dher saara cash yaa chindhi sa cheque de..
Meri baat maan, yeh khaana tu baarik mein fek de"

Diksha fir dheere se khilkhilaakar boli, "I see pukshu ur patloon has become gili.
Anyways, in tomorrow's party you are coming to meet my family"

Ek to saali on an average har 2 minute mein game leti hai
aur upar se aise khatarnaak orders bhi deti hai

Aise invitation pe kya jaana jisme thoda sa bhi romance nahi
Mera Iske ghar pe jaane ka to thoda sa bhi chance nahi..

Jaise hi "no no" kehne ke liye maine mera muh khola
Woh kutta rikshewaala fir dheere se bola..

"Abe chalaa ja..party mein na jaane kismat tujhe aur kitni haseenaaye dikhaayegi..
But I'm sure, Teri jaaneman udhar bhi tujhe aisa hi gandaa khaana khilaayegi.."

Mann hi mann main khud se bol raha tha "Mujhe nahi hai jaana"
Lekin agle moment haske bola "Yeh to Bataao kitne baje hai aana?"

"Pehle yeh bataao kya tum apne paas jhaadu wagaira rakhte ho??
Agar child labour prevention ignore kare to tum to subah subah hi aa sakte ho!

Anyways, since i m not inviting many ppl, kisi se kuch mat kehna..
Aur kal party mein khaana milega is ummeed mein aaj hi se bhukhe mat rehna..

Waise tum shaam ko saat baje aa sakte ho na?
Arey, kab se main hi bole ja rahi hoon, ab tum bhi to kuch kaho na!"

Mann mein socha: "But hey my potty time is strictly at nine."
Lekin fir haske bola "Oh ya 7 o'clock will be just fine!"

Agle din jab I was going to bring our ghar ka ration
Dhyaan mein aaya ki I'd sweetly forgotten to ask the party's occassion..

Will this stupidity of mine create between us any rift?
Chhodo yaar.. occassion hi nahi pataa to kaun le jaayega any gift?

As I saw the watch strike seven,
the rikshewala appeared on the door like a devil in the heaven..

I'm sure he must have thought he'd be looking like a jewel brightly shining
but tell u wat he had a pink shirt with a maroon lining..

"Kya baat hai Bhaiiya! today, u're looking totally in form.."
"thanks, but dont u have anything better to wear than the skool uniform?"

This was yet another remark of his very difficult to ignore
And I was surprised to c a deadly woman in the riksha laughing like a snore...

"Arey wah Bhaiyya yeh dhaasu item kaha se pakad ke laayi??
And what happened to our darling shantibaai?"

"Bus Isko item kehne ki hi reh gayi thi kami...
saale she is MY shantibaai's dearest Mummy"

Anyways, We reached dakshu's house which was simply fantastic..
just then i realised in the riksha mommy dearest was holding onto my halfpant's elastic!

Mommy sed, "Today toh I'm going to have just a halka juice.."
I thought, "had u done that all ur life my halfpant wudn't have been Loose!"

Tabhi mera dhyaan diksha par gaya jisne pehni thi frock pink..
lekin samajh nahi aa raha tha kahaa se aa rahi thi itni gandi Stink.

"Oho Puksha!Bataao bhaiyya ke liye kya gift laaye ho??
Kya baat hai! Aaj Itne chamak rahe ho Kya 1 saal baad Nahaaye ho?"

Still thinking about the stink i wondered if ghar mein beh rahi hai koi gandi si naali..
aur, wah diksha, gift nahi laaya dekh ke tumne meri compliment mein hi maar daali!

"Dikshu, Aise compliments dena mujhe bhi to sikhao...
aur bhaisaab kidhar hai pehle yeh to dikhao!?"

Apne aakho se jaise diksha mujhe bournvita ke pegs pila rahi thi
And I realised ki, agle hi kshan, mujhe apne bhaiya se mila rahi thi..

Bhaiya dekhne mein to tha nothing less than a bloated bandar,
jaise Haathi ka bachha ghus ke baitha ho gende ke pet ke andar..

Khaali haath dekh ke bhaiya bola "diksha tera friend lagta hai totally kangaal.."
Maine socha "saale tu bhi to lagta hai koi jaanwar with a shaven junglee khaal"

Then Diksha announced in the mic that it was time for a game of paired musical chairs..
And turning off the mic said "Kissme nahi to at least u cud've brought me a couple of eclairs!"

Running around I heard diksha's bhaiyaa cheering up as if a donkey braying..
Just then heard a chair crack n without looking knew that Shaantibai's mom was also playing!

Ek angle se I noticed, bhaiyya looked just like a hungry gibbon..
itna amuse ho gaya tha main ki kheech ke tod daali diksha ke baalo ki ribbon..

Rote hue diksha boli "ab to tum aaj ka khaana bilkul hi bhool jaao...
aur kal se us rikshewaale ke saath akele akele hi skool jaao.."

Letting her cry for a while, I wiped her tears with my hands...
n like a magician took out two lovely ribbons from the pockets of my halfpants!

"Hey how did you do that?" she asked me between tears n smiles
And at that instant i just knew together we r gonna go long miles..

So you see, Not just sleeves, even halfpants can hold amazing aces..
Khair.. as I turned I saw diksha's mom and dad's menacing faces

just as i thought " Thik se dekh lo Uncle..main hi tumhaara son in law banne hoon waala..."
he came near and I realized that the stink was not due to a naali but a living naala!!

Tabhi I heard him say "to tum hi ho who keeps giving chocolates to my laadli bitiya..."
I sed "ha uncle... Thankfully I chose the only one in ur family who's not even remotely ghatiya".

"haha Diksha has told me you're quite funny"
then turning to his wife, "Can we book him for our princess, honey?"

So my friends now you see even if the invitations have no romance,
there's no harm in taking up the chance..

Instead of thinking about the gift whole night in twist n twirl,
its always wise to think of all occassions as the birthday of your girl!