Meri Dusri Kavita

To dosto baat us waqt ki hai jab mein rehta tha gaav mein,
Behta tha paani naak se aur chappal nahi thi paav mein.

Khair ek din hamaare gaav mein ek saadhu maharaj aaye the,
Apne saath kuch jaadu ki vastuye aur ek sundar kanya laaye the.

Pataa chalaa us kameene ki kamseen haseena ka naam tha Savita,
Aur saadhu ji ki speaking style synced perfectly with the rhyme scheme of this kavita.

“Toh logo aap to jaante hi hai, hum sab ki aakhir jalne waali hai chitaaye,
Main jaanta hoon jeevan ke saare raaz, aakhir everest pe barah saal fukat hi nahi hai bitaaye

“I am not the one who’d want to give you any false promises,
But first a promise from you - nobody would ogle at my missus.”

Mere taraf dekh ke saadhu bole, “Jaraa idhar to aao baalak,”
Main bhi jaa kar puchne laga, “Kya main mushkil mein hoon maalak?”

Saadhu bole, “I see you eye my Savi as if a hen for a feisty feast!”
I said, “Not at all sir, it’s not in my demeanor to be a nasty beast!”

“Agar aap kahe to main aap ke darbaar se chale jaata hoon,
Everest to main gaya nahi, lekin masala everest ka hi khaata hoon!”

Just as I wished that sadhu’s show would be as flop as Herman,
My ears shook up with the words of his serpentine sermon.

“See I would have told you about my Himalayan quests,
But since it’s beyond your reach, I’d tell you my requests.

To have a sacred soul like me amongst you for long,
And through me, I’d make your souls, bones and teeth so very strong.

I request you to serve me lots of food, butter or oily, without any buts
And oh yeah, every dish has to have a pinch of almonds and cashewnuts.

My life is for serving you, oh god’s best creatures,
I don’t crave beyond grape juices flowing from pitchers.”

Endless requests ka end dhundne school ka Kisna master bhoka
Aur ek jargoned generic statement us sadhu ke maathe Thoka..

“Prabhuwar, hamaare life se dukhho ka saaya hataaye
Aur jeevan saarthak banaane ka koi simplest of simple formula bataaye”

“Dekho hum jaise log bahut complicated cheeze bataate hai,
Jaise jeevan ki patang ko ummeed ke thread se udaate hai

Aise aur fruitlessly futile sentences hum roz roz bataayenge,
Aaj ke liye itna kaafi hai – ab hum fruits ka chadhaava khaayenge.

Jeevan ek jive aur jam session hai jisme jaane na kitne jaane jaa chuki hai,
Aaj aur nahi hoga – apni baate sun sunkar hume hi neend aa chuki hai.”

subah ke low temperature mein gaav waale high pelvic pressure lekar river kinaare jaate the,
Aur Kisna master river water ke volume ko temperature, pressure se relate kar Boyle’s law samjhaate the.

Zor lagaate hue sarpanch bole, “Hum sab ko mil ke zor lagaana hai,
Aaj raat tak hi us dhongi baba ko gaav se bhagaana hai”

Kisna kaka bola “Tumhaare pet ke liye hum sab kyu aur kaise zor lagaayenge?
Jaha tak saadhu ka sawaal hai usey to hum milke hi bhagaayenge.”

Us din hum sabne sadhu ko tremendously tempting mithaayi khilaayi thi,
But the dhaasu sadhu didn’t know ki humne har mithaai mein halki neend ki goli milaayi thi.

“Soye hue saadhu ko iske khatiya ke saath hi uthaao”, harangued the gung-ho Mr. Hangal,
And we promptly deported the smelly bellied saadhu to the middle of the jungle.

Do din ke baad saadhu maharaj jab fir gaav aaye, badal chuka tha sab kuchh,
Andar jaa chukka tha pet aur gaayab thi daadhi – muuchh.

Feeling sorry for the poor fellow, we realized that jungle safari had truly made him suffer,
Savita ji ko dekh ke who muskurakar bola “Kal se hum shuru karenge zindagi mein ek naya safar”

Sun ke usko Savita ji khilkhilaakar boli, “Dekho to mujhe dekh ke kaise aahe bharta hai!”
And giving him a playful punch, she said, “Saala nautanki, ghadi ghadi drama karta hai.”

So the poem ends with the saadhu turning out to be wise and cool,
He eventually became the moral science teacher of the village school.

I swear the poem has finished – mere paas aur kuch nahi hai bataane ke liye,
Agar aapko jungle nahi pahochna to bina soche Comments section ke taraf chaliye!